14 October 2018
I awoke this morning with a feeling of loneliness, it's a feeling I have quite often these days, although I would not openly admit that. My kids are off living their lives, doing their own thing, visiting friends and having fun, and here I sit... waiting...
But waiting for what? A knight in shining armor to come and rescue me? A more fulfilling life? Fun days spent with friends? Exciting things to do?
All of these things are my own responsibility to create but I have only created isolation for myself by not allowing myself to do anything. There is always a reason why something cannot be done; no time (the kids have other plans and I have to fetch and carry), no money (I don't know what unexpected expenses may come up so I have to hold onto what I have), not the type of guy I want (when that guy I cannot even relate to)... on and on the excuses go, and yet I do not do anything about it. Ok, maybe that is not totally true, I do a little, but I never actually break the cycle.
Breaking the cycle would mean actually getting out there and actively doing more things. Deciding to do something and following through on it, not just thinking about it, or my favourite.. "planning"... Planning in my world is another way of procrastinating, because you can plan forever and never move past that phase, because it will never be perfect enough or suitable enough to meet my perception of what everybody else wants.
Everything in our lives is a choice, we choose how it is and how it will be and through the power of out thoughts we create the reality that we experience. If you decide it will be a bad day, that's the type of day you will have.. same for if you decide it will be a good day.
Loneliness and boredom are a choice, self-made out of unrealistic expectations. So today choose to have the type of day you would love to have. Even if all the preconceived ideas you have about what it should look like aren't there, go out and do it anyway. Take the step.
